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notpropaganda73 View Drop Down
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    Posted: 02 Mar 2023 at 10:32am
Thanks both, really do appreciate the replies here and got a couple of PMs as well Thumbs Up
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well done prop and the missus, very proactive and positive thinking, best wishes to you both.
Great to see so many lads on here reply too, lovely to see folk recognise the reality of mental health struggles, hats off to you all.
Mind yourselves.
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Fair play for being proactive on it prop. From personal circumstances, just doing something to try and help yourself has a positive snowball affect (i.e. booking in with counsellors, planning a trip away etc). 

I hope the counselling helps both of you and always feel free to offload on here 
I dont email the count anymore, its been 9 months : ( He even sent me a YBIG scarf for my Birthday
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Originally posted by Gaz Gaz wrote:

Originally posted by notpropaganda73 notpropaganda73 wrote:

cheers for the replies folks, much appreciated Thumbs Up

How are you getting on now prop?

doing ok cheers for checking in Gaz 

had my assessment with the mental health nurse via my private insurance there on Monday and they've scheduled me a call with the counsellor next Monday. Would rather not be a phone but massive wait list for face-to-face appointments even through private apparently. 

Partner is having her first session this morning through the same insurance thank god. she's really struggling so I'm hoping it helps her cope a little. She'll be doing ok but little things will just send her over the edge (90% of the time work-related). She spoke with her boss on Monday about reducing her hours which was a big step, they're looking into how to make the rota work

We're off to Donegal then this afternoon for a long weekend, staying in Redcastle a couple nights and then driving in home on Saturday morning. We're gonna climb Errigal if the weather is alright as well. bringing my wetsuit so regardless of weather I'll be jumping into the sea which always helps clear my head.
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Originally posted by notpropaganda73 notpropaganda73 wrote:

cheers for the replies folks, much appreciated Thumbs Up

How are you getting on now prop?
I dont email the count anymore, its been 9 months : ( He even sent me a YBIG scarf for my Birthday
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Get yourself out and go for a run and work up a sweat - it might help clear your head.
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cheers for the replies folks, much appreciated Thumbs Up
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Originally posted by notpropaganda73 notpropaganda73 wrote:

been a very rough 2023 so far, we moved house which was full on at the start of the year and then my partner (she's Spanish) got awful news from home - her first cousin died by suicide there last week. Apparently he had been struggling for a long time but kept it quiet. and just the drib drab of more information coming through as well, it's been awful. She's distraught over it, they were very close growing up, at their grannys for Christmas and New Year etc., but you know yourselves started drifting a little when they got older and just not keeping in touch as often. Thankfully we managed to get her home for the funeral but she's racked with guilt now, I've been that person left behind and asking all the questions and what you could have done different etc., but even though I understand how she's feeling I've no idea how to support her through it. 

I don't mean to make it about me at all I just needed an outlet here to get it out a little, but I've been really struggling to support her I think, though I know she would say she appreciates how I've been there for her etc. Even though I'm probably hiding it well enough from her I'm struggling when I'm left alone, can't focus on my work at all (which is piling up big time) and just generally feeling extremely low/on the verge of tears. It's brought up a lot of old feelings of anxiety and depression so I'm looking at speaking with a counsellor again sooner rather than later. Thankfully I have private medical insurance through my work and there's a route through that to have sessions direct with counsellors or psychologists after initial assessment. My girlfriend is on my insurance plan as well so I think we'll do it together this weekend. 

anyway just needed to get that out 

It does sound like from those who would know better than me that you've made the right move already. Hopefully you'll be back to feeling better soon.
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Originally posted by notpropaganda73 notpropaganda73 wrote:

been a very rough 2023 so far, we moved house which was full on at the start of the year and then my partner (she's Spanish) got awful news from home - her first cousin died by suicide there last week. Apparently he had been struggling for a long time but kept it quiet. and just the drib drab of more information coming through as well, it's been awful. She's distraught over it, they were very close growing up, at their grannys for Christmas and New Year etc., but you know yourselves started drifting a little when they got older and just not keeping in touch as often. Thankfully we managed to get her home for the funeral but she's racked with guilt now, I've been that person left behind and asking all the questions and what you could have done different etc., but even though I understand how she's feeling I've no idea how to support her through it. 

I don't mean to make it about me at all I just needed an outlet here to get it out a little, but I've been really struggling to support her I think, though I know she would say she appreciates how I've been there for her etc. Even though I'm probably hiding it well enough from her I'm struggling when I'm left alone, can't focus on my work at all (which is piling up big time) and just generally feeling extremely low/on the verge of tears. It's brought up a lot of old feelings of anxiety and depression so I'm looking at speaking with a counsellor again sooner rather than later. Thankfully I have private medical insurance through my work and there's a route through that to have sessions direct with counsellors or psychologists after initial assessment. My girlfriend is on my insurance plan as well so I think we'll do it together this weekend. 

anyway just needed to get that out 


Go for the counselling.   The assessment is an easy process, and you will probably have a 15/20 min call with a counsellor to help out initially and then they will set you up with a number of sessions with another counsellor in your area, or over the phone if you would prefer.
As mentioned, talking to someone helps a lot and can bring you back from 5th gear to 1st gear in your head.
Well done on starting to get it out.
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Originally posted by notpropaganda73 notpropaganda73 wrote:

been a very rough 2023 so far, we moved house which was full on at the start of the year and then my partner (she's Spanish) got awful news from home - her first cousin died by suicide there last week. Apparently he had been struggling for a long time but kept it quiet. and just the drib drab of more information coming through as well, it's been awful. She's distraught over it, they were very close growing up, at their grannys for Christmas and New Year etc., but you know yourselves started drifting a little when they got older and just not keeping in touch as often. Thankfully we managed to get her home for the funeral but she's racked with guilt now, I've been that person left behind and asking all the questions and what you could have done different etc., but even though I understand how she's feeling I've no idea how to support her through it. 

I don't mean to make it about me at all I just needed an outlet here to get it out a little, but I've been really struggling to support her I think, though I know she would say she appreciates how I've been there for her etc. Even though I'm probably hiding it well enough from her I'm struggling when I'm left alone, can't focus on my work at all (which is piling up big time) and just generally feeling extremely low/on the verge of tears. It's brought up a lot of old feelings of anxiety and depression so I'm looking at speaking with a counsellor again sooner rather than later. Thankfully I have private medical insurance through my work and there's a route through that to have sessions direct with counsellors or psychologists after initial assessment. My girlfriend is on my insurance plan as well so I think we'll do it together this weekend. 

anyway just needed to get that out 

Good man, talking is half the battle. Been similarly affected over the last five or six years, there’s never a chance to take a breath and relax but we’re getting there slowly. You’re doing absolutely the right things though. Good luck to you both.
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been a very rough 2023 so far, we moved house which was full on at the start of the year and then my partner (she's Spanish) got awful news from home - her first cousin died by suicide there last week. Apparently he had been struggling for a long time but kept it quiet. and just the drib drab of more information coming through as well, it's been awful. She's distraught over it, they were very close growing up, at their grannys for Christmas and New Year etc., but you know yourselves started drifting a little when they got older and just not keeping in touch as often. Thankfully we managed to get her home for the funeral but she's racked with guilt now, I've been that person left behind and asking all the questions and what you could have done different etc., but even though I understand how she's feeling I've no idea how to support her through it. 

I don't mean to make it about me at all I just needed an outlet here to get it out a little, but I've been really struggling to support her I think, though I know she would say she appreciates how I've been there for her etc. Even though I'm probably hiding it well enough from her I'm struggling when I'm left alone, can't focus on my work at all (which is piling up big time) and just generally feeling extremely low/on the verge of tears. It's brought up a lot of old feelings of anxiety and depression so I'm looking at speaking with a counsellor again sooner rather than later. Thankfully I have private medical insurance through my work and there's a route through that to have sessions direct with counsellors or psychologists after initial assessment. My girlfriend is on my insurance plan as well so I think we'll do it together this weekend. 

anyway just needed to get that out 
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Originally posted by Double Maxim Double Maxim wrote:

Originally posted by Artie Ziff Artie Ziff wrote:

Howdy DM, I hope the Sunderland results are cheering you up a bit. It's the hardest time of the year for many. But there will always be another brighter day ahead. 

As mentioned a new hobby in 2023 like hillwalking or sea walks groups are always looking for new members. Or perhaps volunteering with a charity, scouts, food banks, education centres etc. Personally, if I had time (maybe in the future) I'd teach adults to improve their reading skills. As the proverb goes give a man a fish you feed him for a day but teach him how to fish you feed him for life. 


I actually do some work with an autism guy reading to him which I love 

It's not so much finding new things to do I've a full itenary ( I was walking for about an hour this morning)  it's coming back to  a cold empty house anyway I feel positive currently having a pint of DM before watching the match.

Thanks to you all for your kindness most appreciated.
Fill the time outside of your gaff as best you can - not always easy - and that hopefully makes your time at home “your space”. 
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Originally posted by MC Hammered MC Hammered wrote:


You’re a good lad DM. I hope you have a great 2023
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Edited by BigStrongMan - 28 Dec 2022 at 10:39pm
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Originally posted by MC Hammered MC Hammered wrote:


You’re a good lad DM. I hope you have a great 2023

Thanks I really appreciate those kind words.
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You’re a good lad DM. I hope you have a great 2023
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Originally posted by Artie Ziff Artie Ziff wrote:

Howdy DM, I hope the Sunderland results are cheering you up a bit. It's the hardest time of the year for many. But there will always be another brighter day ahead. 

As mentioned a new hobby in 2023 like hillwalking or sea walks groups are always looking for new members. Or perhaps volunteering with a charity, scouts, food banks, education centres etc. Personally, if I had time (maybe in the future) I'd teach adults to improve their reading skills. As the proverb goes give a man a fish you feed him for a day but teach him how to fish you feed him for life. 


I actually do some work with an autism guy reading to him which I love 

It's not so much finding new things to do I've a full itenary ( I was walking for about an hour this morning)  it's coming back to  a cold empty house anyway I feel positive currently having a pint of DM before watching the match.

Thanks to you all for your kindness most appreciated.


Edited by Double Maxim - 28 Dec 2022 at 6:34pm
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Howdy DM, I hope the Sunderland results are cheering you up a bit. It's the hardest time of the year for many. But there will always be another brighter day ahead. 

As mentioned a new hobby in 2023 like hillwalking or sea walks groups are always looking for new members. Or perhaps volunteering with a charity, scouts, food banks, education centres etc. Personally, if I had time (maybe in the future) I'd teach adults to improve their reading skills. As the proverb goes give a man a fish you feed him for a day but teach him how to fish you feed him for life. 
It would damage this forums' reputation
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Lonliness is a bitch but as said don't be fooled by social media or all that bolloxology DM. Maybe get stuck into some new activities in the new year.  A social club or drama class etc.. literally anything to get meeting people.  Staying on your own waiting to feel better is not the right approach.  You should get proactive imo.Thumbs Up
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