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How much do you stick in a wedding card?

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote pre Madonna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 3:38pm
That’s why they split up...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Het-field Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 4:45pm
Originally posted by DUBLIN DOC DUBLIN DOC wrote:

As we only give money to the couple we have only ever gotten the thank you for the card reply, and knowing the people’s weddings we were at I can definitely say they would not have kept a list of who gave how much to them

Their cards were wide of the mark etiquette wisez
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote The Huntacha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 4:59pm
Originally posted by Het-field Het-field wrote:

Originally posted by deise316 deise316 wrote:

Originally posted by Het-field Het-field wrote:

There seems to be an expectation amongst some posters about what they are entitled to at their wedding. Even the most useless gift I received was not going to be criticised, as nobody has to get you anything.

Culture of entitlement HF, its fcukin everywhere. Once got invited to a distant relatives wedding, she had wan of these acceptable gift list suggestion things, it was a while ago, don't remember the prices, but all fairly expensive by the standards of the time. Didn't go to wedding- problem solved. 

I'd have an old fashioned belief that ya should be attending because they think some little thing of you, not to furnish their fcukin house. 



Honestly, I have no problem with registries or gift lists. They are essentially polite suggestions, and as a rule comprise of fairly basic and relatively inexpensive stuff which dwarfs the sums of money mentioned as the recommended amount today.

I often feel the “give us cash” approach is a lot worse as it is limiting and assumes the availability of cash, which may not be available, when you might be able to pick up a box of cup measures and assorted spoon measures for £20 as a useful and welcome gift.

I remember reading a story about somebody sending out cards essentially telling a group of friends that they had not made the cut for the wedding, but if they wanted to participate they could use the stated bank details to contribute to the wedding fund.

I hope they were told to get fcuked LOL
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Het-field Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 8:30pm
Originally posted by The Huntacha The Huntacha wrote:

Originally posted by Het-field Het-field wrote:

Originally posted by deise316 deise316 wrote:

Originally posted by Het-field Het-field wrote:

There seems to be an expectation amongst some posters about what they are entitled to at their wedding. Even the most useless gift I received was not going to be criticised, as nobody has to get you anything.

Culture of entitlement HF, its fcukin everywhere. Once got invited to a distant relatives wedding, she had wan of these acceptable gift list suggestion things, it was a while ago, don't remember the prices, but all fairly expensive by the standards of the time. Didn't go to wedding- problem solved. 

I'd have an old fashioned belief that ya should be attending because they think some little thing of you, not to furnish their fcukin house. 



Honestly, I have no problem with registries or gift lists. They are essentially polite suggestions, and as a rule comprise of fairly basic and relatively inexpensive stuff which dwarfs the sums of money mentioned as the recommended amount today.

I often feel the “give us cash” approach is a lot worse as it is limiting and assumes the availability of cash, which may not be available, when you might be able to pick up a box of cup measures and assorted spoon measures for £20 as a useful and welcome gift.

I remember reading a story about somebody sending out cards essentially telling a group of friends that they had not made the cut for the wedding, but if they wanted to participate they could use the stated bank details to contribute to the wedding fund.

I hope they were told to get fcuked LOL
Yep


Edited by Het-field - 19 Apr 2019 at 8:31pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Scamper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 9:25pm
We spent 26k on wedding. got 20k back

but also spent 15k on honeymoon

minimum I would put in a card is 200

we had 1 couple at ours gave nothing

and one gave 500. 

169 people seated

it is what it is. we just wanted people to be there.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Green Devil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 10:13pm
Originally posted by Scamper Scamper wrote:

We spent 26k on wedding. got 20k back

but also spent 15k on honeymoon

minimum I would put in a card is 200

we had 1 couple at ours gave nothing

and one gave 500. 

169 people seated

it is what it is. we just wanted people to be there.

Where did you go?


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Claret Murph Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 11:40pm
Originally posted by Green Devil Green Devil wrote:

Originally posted by Scamper Scamper wrote:

We spent 26k on wedding. got 20k back

but also spent 15k on honeymoon

minimum I would put in a card is 200

we had 1 couple at ours gave nothing

and one gave 500. 

169 people seated

it is what it is. we just wanted people to be there.

Where did you go? He told me Dundalk , mad expensive these days not sure how BSM can afford for his holidays 


Lansdowne Road debut aged 52 and 201 days .
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote robbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 11:42pm
Getting married towards the end of the year. Budget for our wedding is 20k and both given a few bob by our parents towards it. We've found a venue, at which we can do our own catering and bar, so we're able to save an absolute fortune on the grub and we've been stocking up on the booze over the past year. By own catering i mean, we've sourced a caterer who will do it as a nixer for a price.

Just reading through some of the comments on presents and money expected, from a personal standpoint, we don't expect a penny from anyone on the day. We're not getting married in the hope that peoples donations fund the cost of it nor are we hoping it leaves us more than we budgeted. It's not a money making exercise. We have friends and relatives travelling from all around the world to be at the wedding so to expect a gift of them is just wrong, considering the fact it's probably already cost them an arm and a leg to get here. We've also tried to arrange our wedding to be as cheap for all attendees as possible by providing a bring your own tent and camp option and also why we're supplying the booze plus a byob option, there will also be buses running from Dublin to the venue and back again. 

The costs of weddings are already absurdly disgusting, I've learnt this from trying to book musicians and photographers, they almost quadruple their price when they hear wedding. I've actually laughed at a few we've contacted e.g brass band we wanted to play for an hour, all they do is busk in Dublin city, nothing else, asked them how much and they wanted 1k to play. Here lads, you busk for a living, i'd say it takes you a month to make that, seriously, get f**ked! It's not that much in the grand scheme of things, 5 or 6 in the group, wedding is an hour outside of Dublin but still, to go from probably making €3 an hour busking to wanting €150 for 2-3 hours (including travel) it's just ridiculous.

To tie this all back in to the topic in hand, when I've invited someone to my wedding, it's because i want them to be there and enjoy the day, i'm not hitting them up for as much as possible but I know people do this. It's a sick culture sometimes and the fact that people, getting married, try to exploit their family and friends for money or keep a list of who gave what is frankly disgusting. While your perception of a certain person might be that they have a job and money and should be able to afford it, you don't know their circumstances. They have already more than likely spent a good bit on a hotel, then they'll drop another 100+ on drinks for the day and now you want a gift or more cash? Get f**ked you greedy ****s. Don't get married and spend absurd amounts on the day, expecting your guests to foot the bill essentially. I'd rather most weddings i went to were in a pub where we all just had a great time and have a laugh, rather than these ostentatious showcases of insecurity. 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sham157 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 2019 at 11:59pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DUBLIN DOC Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 1:02am
Don’t want to quote Robbos post but at last the truth about a wedding, and some hungry coonts and the lengths they go to help fund it , Robbo best of luck and fair play you and your quare wan want your day without making people pay for it Clap
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JUICEBOMB Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 1:10am
correct me if I'm wrong....but is the most common way now to get married not he registry way??ive been at two of these weddings where the whole ceremony is in one place(one an up market pub and the other a two star hotel in town) and both weddings where better than any flash,keeping up with the joneses type weddings I've ever been to.i suppose my point is if you want to get married there are alternative and far cheaper ways to do it,it's up to yourself if you want to get suckered into paying thousands.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote eireland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 4:21am
Agreed. Nobody is forced to go. I may give €100 for myself but if I'm invited to a wedding I'm not too pushed about I just won't go. Or I'll go to the church but not the afters. 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Zinedine Kilbane 110 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 7:36am
Originally posted by robbo robbo wrote:

The costs of weddings are already absurdly disgusting, I've learnt this from trying to book musicians and photographers, they almost quadruple their price when they hear wedding. I've actually laughed at a few we've contacted e.g brass band we wanted to play for an hour, all they do is busk in Dublin city, nothing else, asked them how much and they wanted 1k to play. Here lads, you busk for a living, i'd say it takes you a month to make that, seriously, get f**ked! It's not that much in the grand scheme of things, 5 or 6 in the group, wedding is an hour outside of Dublin but still, to go from probably making €3 an hour busking to wanting €150 for 2-3 hours (including travel) it's just ridiculous.


This kind of thing is really sickening.
As you say, mention wedding and every price doubles.
The meals, food, clothes and band etc I didn’t mind as people got something from it.
It was the little extra’s that are massively overpriced like covers on the back of chairs (3/4 each), flower arrangements etc that are a total rip off.

The next time I get married I will take a small group to the Caribbean and do it on a beach.

Good luck with it Robbo. It’s an amazing day. 


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Roberto Baggio Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 7:39am
All true Robbo. We invited people who we wanted to share our big day with as well. Under no circumstance did we invite people to cover the cost, it was paid off well in advance. 
The truth of the matter is that whether you like it or not no one is going to go with two arms the one length. They’d be disgraced.
You’re going to get money in an envelope whether you like it or pretend not to 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote The Huntacha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 7:41am
Not sure if I've mentioned it on here before but one of the best weddings I was at was in the Gravity Bar in the Guinness Storehouse. The couple live in Australia so just did the registry office thing when they got back to Ireland and then everybody met in the Storehouse. Very laid back atmosphere at it, which is how they wanted it as because they flew back to get married, they didnt want to be stuck at the top table for hours and not be able to get around and chat to the guests as much as they wanted. Cost them about 8k in total to rent out the room and then provide an open bar for everyone for 3 or 4 hours. 

Edited by The Huntacha - 20 Apr 2019 at 7:42am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lenny82 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 7:56am
Originally posted by robbo robbo wrote:

Getting married towards the end of the year. Budget for our wedding is 20k and both given a few bob by our parents towards it. We've found a venue, at which we can do our own catering and bar, so we're able to save an absolute fortune on the grub and we've been stocking up on the booze over the past year. By own catering i mean, we've sourced a caterer who will do it as a nixer for a price.

Just reading through some of the comments on presents and money expected, from a personal standpoint, we don't expect a penny from anyone on the day. We're not getting married in the hope that peoples donations fund the cost of it nor are we hoping it leaves us more than we budgeted. It's not a money making exercise. We have friends and relatives travelling from all around the world to be at the wedding so to expect a gift of them is just wrong, considering the fact it's probably already cost them an arm and a leg to get here. We've also tried to arrange our wedding to be as cheap for all attendees as possible by providing a bring your own tent and camp option and also why we're supplying the booze plus a byob option, there will also be buses running from Dublin to the venue and back again. 

The costs of weddings are already absurdly disgusting, I've learnt this from trying to book musicians and photographers, they almost quadruple their price when they hear wedding. I've actually laughed at a few we've contacted e.g brass band we wanted to play for an hour, all they do is busk in Dublin city, nothing else, asked them how much and they wanted 1k to play. Here lads, you busk for a living, i'd say it takes you a month to make that, seriously, get f**ked! It's not that much in the grand scheme of things, 5 or 6 in the group, wedding is an hour outside of Dublin but still, to go from probably making €3 an hour busking to wanting €150 for 2-3 hours (including travel) it's just ridiculous.

To tie this all back in to the topic in hand, when I've invited someone to my wedding, it's because i want them to be there and enjoy the day, i'm not hitting them up for as much as possible but I know people do this. It's a sick culture sometimes and the fact that people, getting married, try to exploit their family and friends for money or keep a list of who gave what is frankly disgusting. While your perception of a certain person might be that they have a job and money and should be able to afford it, you don't know their circumstances. They have already more than likely spent a good bit on a hotel, then they'll drop another 100+ on drinks for the day and now you want a gift or more cash? Get f**ked you greedy ****s. Don't get married and spend absurd amounts on the day, expecting your guests to foot the bill essentially. I'd rather most weddings i went to were in a pub where we all just had a great time and have a laugh, rather than these ostentatious showcases of insecurity. 

I assume then, you will be posting back any cash gifts you receive to the giver?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote robbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 Apr 2019 at 8:56am
No we won’t be because that’s just ridiculous. As I said we don’t expect anything, similar to a birthday, I don’t expect anything from anyone but if I’m given a few bob as a present I’m not going to hand it back.
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