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DUBLIN DOC
Jack Charlton
The F The F The FAI
Joined: 30 Jun 2009
Location: Abbottstown
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 1:10pm |
da_launchpad wrote:
Ah jesus - that is epic story f**kin hell!!! Is she back with you now? |
Unfortunately not, she has a kid from the maggot also, but we are still friends and she is friendly with my sister who she would see fairly regular, i dont seee her that often really but i am quiet happy with my lot atm and so is she
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GB 1HughJarse
Liam Brady
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 1:47pm |
DUBLIN DOC wrote:
I know there is a lot of non believers in me out there but this is gospel, i was going out with a girl for 6 and a half years, but we broke up over a little indescresion that i had when she went to Australia for a family members wedding, which i had refused to splash the cash to go to for 3 weeks (fck that 3 weeks with the lads on the piss seemed a great idea to me). Anyway out on the lash with the lads and this other wan starts chatting to me, seemed a nice enough girl at the start of the night so thought nothing of it but coming to closing time she appears over again and asks me where i was going next to which i said home, but i told her the lads were going on to a club and 1 of the lads fancied her but she batted that away and said would i walk her home so with a nice few drinks on board i said yeah, anyway 1 thing led to another and she was dropping her drawers for a few meetings we had over the 3 weeks ( i made this okay in my head by thinking the the mot in Australia would be doing the same probably )
Anyway unbeknownst to me one of the mates had a friend of his with him on the night yer wan first emerged and the dirty coont told his sister who turned out to know my mot and of course been a nosey coont she asked the mot had we broken up when she got back from Australia because i had not gone, to which the mot said no, and of course the nosey coont followed up with (yes you got it) Oh when i seen him with ***** ******* i though you's were finished, well you's know the rest and nothing was going to fix it.
Forward on 4 years and out 1 night with a girl we bump into the ex with her new fella and got talking for about half an hour and something in me head was saying i know yer man from somewhere so i asked the ex and lo an behold it was only the fcker that had been in our company on the night i met the bird in the pub the coont that squelt to his sister the dirty coont, anyway the ex starts getting a bit soppy and asks would it be okay if we meet up to have a chat well i'm a free spirt and say yes, so to cut a long story short we meet over a couple of drinks and i get the feeling there is still something there between us but she tells me your man asked to to marry him and what did i think, i just said sure if you are happy why not and if you are not say no, have to say i got out of there and was quiet sad that i had fcked all this up as i knew by the way i felt that i still was mad about her.
After numerous phone calls and not having the balls to tell her how i felt and her not willing to do the same the date was approaching for the wedding and an invitation was giving to me but just for myself no plus 1, the girl i was knocking off at the time was not impressed but she did not know the extent of the link between us, she said to me you are not going to a wedding without me and i agreed (did not think i would be able to stomach it anyway, watching the girl i wanted but fcked it all up) anyway 2 days before the wedding i was due to go to a party with the mot and pulled the oul i am dying sick with the flu, sher go with your mates it will be grand i said as i decided to plot going to the wedding.
So anyway day of the wedding and i am still will i wont i, so say fck it a day out i will know most there and they will know me sure what could go wrong, proceed to the church and am welcomed with open arms by most of her family, i got on really well with them anyway especially her brothers who were sound and her sisters who were good craic, sure we used to babysit their kids (many's a good night had in their houses when the kids had gone asleep ) so we proceeded to the hollybrook hotel for the festivities and after the dinner and all the usual shoite speeches in which the coonts groomsman made a passing remark in which i was mentioned and got a good laugh from his half of the room, one of the ex's brothers said to me are you going to let him get away with that, i did not know what to say never mid what to do i just wanted to leave but i was convinced to stay, anyway i was making my way back from the jacks to the bar when the ex called me in the hallway to talk to me and was trying to apologise for the w**ker putting shoite like that in the speech (i wont lie i felt the tears welling up in my eyes as i looked ah her standing there and thinking that it should be me in the room sitting at the top table in my wedding suit but i just held them back but she could see i was hurting) she took me by the hand and we walked to the reception area and had a heart to heart and i let her know how i felt but wished her all the very best in marriage but she said why did i not do this before hand i was sad that i had said this now but she would not let it go, so i had to say what was bugging me about the incident back those years ago and how that sneaky coont had wormed his way to her by fckin squealing on me and then moving in for the kill (would probably do it myself if i liked the girl enough ) the coont was now coming out to the reception area with a couple of his gobshoites to ask what was going on and what i was at so i said just having a chat with a very good friend and she backed me up to which he replied well everyone is waiting on her and she should get back in the room, she said she would be a few minutes as we were not finished talking and sent him on his way to my glee her brother had come out to make sure nothing physical was going to happen "ahem" as he said to me you should have clocked the coont, the sneaky coont certainly was not a family favourite the brother said to us to take our time. Next thing i know we are walking upstairs holding hands and i find myself standing at her door with lips locking horns, enter the room and straight onto the bed jaysus some job banging a bird in a wedding dress and her not wanting to get "anything on it" it was a great ride fairly quick but great we headed back to the reception area about 15 after the event where she proceeded to walk back intothe room and i just hung back and all i could see was her brother standing there looking at me with a big smirk on his face and then saying "i meant get the fcking groomsman back not the fckin groom but sure fck it he is a coont too " we just laughed and wandered back in, i had a huge smile on my face everytime i looked at the smug coont kissing his bride knowing where my cock had been just a short time earlier
They broke up about 5 years later she was never happy | Holy Divine Mother and St Peter and all the Saints, what a story, i'd watch that if it was made into a mini-series.
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MC Hammered
Jack Charlton
Joined: 05 Oct 2011
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 1:54pm |
DOC arriving with his wedding gift
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El Puto Amo
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GB 1HughJarse
Liam Brady
Joined: 03 Sep 2015
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 1:56pm |
Lad on his own stag down the country, snogs a girl in the pub, one of his friends takes a picture of him doing it. Meanwhile back at home, the girl who is getting married calls around to her mate, her mate is in kitchen getting more drinks, when her phone pings with a message, it is the picture of the groom snogging this qaure one, the mate says to the bride-to- be "will you see what that is on my phone, the bride-to-be picks up the phone and sees the picture and text "look what this prick is up to!" Wedding cancelled.
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Butch
Ray Houghton
Joined: 16 Oct 2014
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 2:07pm |
@ Doc ... How much was in the card
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Charlton's Child
Liam Brady
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 2:08pm |
You should write a book DOC
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Croftman
Liam Brady
Joined: 18 Aug 2014
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 3:13pm |
GB 1HughJarse wrote:
Lad on his own stag down the country, snogs a girl in the pub, one of his friends takes a picture of him doing it. Meanwhile back at home, the girl who is getting married calls around to her mate, her mate is in kitchen getting more drinks, when her phone pings with a message, it is the picture of the groom snogging this qaure one, the mate says to the bride-to- be "will you see what that is on my phone, the bride-to-be picks up the phone and sees the picture and text "look what this prick is up to!" Wedding cancelled. |
That's no friend - what a coont
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Some people just deserve a slap
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ConorMac77
Ray Houghton
Joined: 22 Apr 2015
Location: Newry
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 3:41pm |
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The nation holds it's breath...YES, WE'RE THERE!!!
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HuntysCousin
Jack Charlton
Joined: 26 Sep 2011
Location: Waterford
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 4:11pm |
DUBLIN DOC wrote:
I know there is a lot of non believers in me out there but this is gospel, i was going out with a girl for 6 and a half years, but we broke up over a little indescresion that i had when she went to Australia for a family members wedding, which i had refused to splash the cash to go to for 3 weeks (fck that 3 weeks with the lads on the piss seemed a great idea to me). Anyway out on the lash with the lads and this other wan starts chatting to me, seemed a nice enough girl at the start of the night so thought nothing of it but coming to closing time she appears over again and asks me where i was going next to which i said home, but i told her the lads were going on to a club and 1 of the lads fancied her but she batted that away and said would i walk her home so with a nice few drinks on board i said yeah, anyway 1 thing led to another and she was dropping her drawers for a few meetings we had over the 3 weeks ( i made this okay in my head by thinking the the mot in Australia would be doing the same probably )
Anyway unbeknownst to me one of the mates had a friend of his with him on the night yer wan first emerged and the dirty coont told his sister who turned out to know my mot and of course been a nosey coont she asked the mot had we broken up when she got back from Australia because i had not gone, to which the mot said no, and of course the nosey coont followed up with (yes you got it) Oh when i seen him with ***** ******* i though you's were finished, well you's know the rest and nothing was going to fix it.
Forward on 4 years and out 1 night with a girl we bump into the ex with her new fella and got talking for about half an hour and something in me head was saying i know yer man from somewhere so i asked the ex and lo an behold it was only the fcker that had been in our company on the night i met the bird in the pub the coont that squelt to his sister the dirty coont, anyway the ex starts getting a bit soppy and asks would it be okay if we meet up to have a chat well i'm a free spirt and say yes, so to cut a long story short we meet over a couple of drinks and i get the feeling there is still something there between us but she tells me your man asked to to marry him and what did i think, i just said sure if you are happy why not and if you are not say no, have to say i got out of there and was quiet sad that i had fcked all this up as i knew by the way i felt that i still was mad about her.
After numerous phone calls and not having the balls to tell her how i felt and her not willing to do the same the date was approaching for the wedding and an invitation was giving to me but just for myself no plus 1, the girl i was knocking off at the time was not impressed but she did not know the extent of the link between us, she said to me you are not going to a wedding without me and i agreed (did not think i would be able to stomach it anyway, watching the girl i wanted but fcked it all up) anyway 2 days before the wedding i was due to go to a party with the mot and pulled the oul i am dying sick with the flu, sher go with your mates it will be grand i said as i decided to plot going to the wedding.
So anyway day of the wedding and i am still will i wont i, so say fck it a day out i will know most there and they will know me sure what could go wrong, proceed to the church and am welcomed with open arms by most of her family, i got on really well with them anyway especially her brothers who were sound and her sisters who were good craic, sure we used to babysit their kids (many's a good night had in their houses when the kids had gone asleep ) so we proceeded to the hollybrook hotel for the festivities and after the dinner and all the usual shoite speeches in which the coonts groomsman made a passing remark in which i was mentioned and got a good laugh from his half of the room, one of the ex's brothers said to me are you going to let him get away with that, i did not know what to say never mid what to do i just wanted to leave but i was convinced to stay, anyway i was making my way back from the jacks to the bar when the ex called me in the hallway to talk to me and was trying to apologise for the w**ker putting shoite like that in the speech (i wont lie i felt the tears welling up in my eyes as i looked ah her standing there and thinking that it should be me in the room sitting at the top table in my wedding suit but i just held them back but she could see i was hurting) she took me by the hand and we walked to the reception area and had a heart to heart and i let her know how i felt but wished her all the very best in marriage but she said why did i not do this before hand i was sad that i had said this now but she would not let it go, so i had to say what was bugging me about the incident back those years ago and how that sneaky coont had wormed his way to her by fckin squealing on me and then moving in for the kill (would probably do it myself if i liked the girl enough ) the coont was now coming out to the reception area with a couple of his gobshoites to ask what was going on and what i was at so i said just having a chat with a very good friend and she backed me up to which he replied well everyone is waiting on her and she should get back in the room, she said she would be a few minutes as we were not finished talking and sent him on his way to my glee her brother had come out to make sure nothing physical was going to happen "ahem" as he said to me you should have clocked the coont, the sneaky coont certainly was not a family favourite the brother said to us to take our time. Next thing i know we are walking upstairs holding hands and i find myself standing at her door with lips locking horns, enter the room and straight onto the bed jaysus some job banging a bird in a wedding dress and her not wanting to get "anything on it" it was a great ride fairly quick but great we headed back to the reception area about 15 after the event where she proceeded to walk back intothe room and i just hung back and all i could see was her brother standing there looking at me with a big smirk on his face and then saying "i meant get the fcking groomsman back not the fckin groom but sure fck it he is a coont too " we just laughed and wandered back in, i had a huge smile on my face everytime i looked at the smug coont kissing his bride knowing where my cock had been just a short time earlier
They broke up about 5 years later she was never happy | U ok hun
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FREEWHEELER
Robbie Keane
sPICE UP YOUR LIFE Gwan MONROY
Joined: 29 Mar 2007
Location: Ireland
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 5:12pm |
Cover the cost of the meal (two meals if you're mrs is with you) and a bit on top (no dirty jokes). Some Fair City yarn there Dublin Doc.......... , sure how would you have left any marks on a white dress unless you took her up the gicker using the dress as a jonny?
Edited by FREEWHEELER - 20 Sep 2017 at 5:18pm
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We'll never die, we'll never die, we'll keep the Green Flag flying high......Shamrock Rovers will never die, we'll keep the Green Flag Flying high. 19 Leagues and 25 Cups.....
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t_rAndy
Robbie Keane
Joined: 06 Feb 2008
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 5:16pm |
Croftman wrote:
GB 1HughJarse wrote:
Lad on his own stag down the country, snogs a girl in the pub, one of his friends takes a picture of him doing it. Meanwhile back at home, the girl who is getting married calls around to her mate, her mate is in kitchen getting more drinks, when her phone pings with a message, it is the picture of the groom snogging this qaure one, the mate says to the bride-to- be "will you see what that is on my phone, the bride-to-be picks up the phone and sees the picture and text "look what this prick is up to!" Wedding cancelled. |
That's no friend - what a coont | Never understand blokes breaking the bro code. Happens a lot. I have a colleague who admits himself he can't lie to his missus and tells her everything. He was out with friends in Dublin one night and he hung himself and landed his mates in it by spilling to the missus that the reason he was home at all hours was cause he was in a strip club with the lads and had got a private dance. Needless to say his missus was not impressed told all the other girlfriends/wives. He went on a stags and with the same group he ended up seperated from them. He is convinced they bailed on him so they could misbehave in peace
Edited by t_rAndy - 20 Sep 2017 at 5:21pm
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horsebox
Robbie Keane
Born n bred in darndale.
Joined: 03 Feb 2010
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 6:47pm |
What an absolute bellend your mate is.
Absolute snitch.
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It was far across the sea, When the devil got a hold of me, He wouldn't set me free, So he kept me soul for ransom. na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na. I'm a sailor man from Glasgow to
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drog addict
Jack Charlton
Castleknocker
Joined: 21 Oct 2008
Location: Sunnyvale
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 7:10pm |
Have a couple of snitches in our group. Cant keep their mouth shut about anything. Why in f**ks name would you tell yer missis about what you or the lads got up to on a night out or a stag except ye had a load of beers and in bed by one
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Gigibongi33
Kevin Kilbane
Joined: 13 Feb 2016
Location: Dublin
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Posted: 20 Sep 2017 at 7:17pm |
From a female perspective I'd be more suspicious of the fella if he said he didn't visit a strip club on a stag! ya hardly expect any woman to believe ya just went to the pub and was in bed by 1 am
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Cabra Hoop
Roy Keane
Joined: 06 Feb 2012
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Posted: 22 Sep 2017 at 10:49am |
DUBLIN DOC wrote:
I know there is a lot of non believers in me out there but this is gospel, i was going out with a girl for 6 and a half years, but we broke up over a little indescresion that i had when she went to Australia for a family members wedding, which i had refused to splash the cash to go to for 3 weeks (fck that 3 weeks with the lads on the piss seemed a great idea to me). Anyway out on the lash with the lads and this other wan starts chatting to me, seemed a nice enough girl at the start of the night so thought nothing of it but coming to closing time she appears over again and asks me where i was going next to which i said home, but i told her the lads were going on to a club and 1 of the lads fancied her but she batted that away and said would i walk her home so with a nice few drinks on board i said yeah, anyway 1 thing led to another and she was dropping her drawers for a few meetings we had over the 3 weeks ( i made this okay in my head by thinking the the mot in Australia would be doing the same probably )
Anyway unbeknownst to me one of the mates had a friend of his with him on the night yer wan first emerged and the dirty coont told his sister who turned out to know my mot and of course been a nosey coont she asked the mot had we broken up when she got back from Australia because i had not gone, to which the mot said no, and of course the nosey coont followed up with (yes you got it) Oh when i seen him with ***** ******* i though you's were finished, well you's know the rest and nothing was going to fix it.
Forward on 4 years and out 1 night with a girl we bump into the ex with her new fella and got talking for about half an hour and something in me head was saying i know yer man from somewhere so i asked the ex and lo an behold it was only the fcker that had been in our company on the night i met the bird in the pub the coont that squelt to his sister the dirty coont, anyway the ex starts getting a bit soppy and asks would it be okay if we meet up to have a chat well i'm a free spirt and say yes, so to cut a long story short we meet over a couple of drinks and i get the feeling there is still something there between us but she tells me your man asked to to marry him and what did i think, i just said sure if you are happy why not and if you are not say no, have to say i got out of there and was quiet sad that i had fcked all this up as i knew by the way i felt that i still was mad about her.
After numerous phone calls and not having the balls to tell her how i felt and her not willing to do the same the date was approaching for the wedding and an invitation was giving to me but just for myself no plus 1, the girl i was knocking off at the time was not impressed but she did not know the extent of the link between us, she said to me you are not going to a wedding without me and i agreed (did not think i would be able to stomach it anyway, watching the girl i wanted but fcked it all up) anyway 2 days before the wedding i was due to go to a party with the mot and pulled the oul i am dying sick with the flu, sher go with your mates it will be grand i said as i decided to plot going to the wedding.
So anyway day of the wedding and i am still will i wont i, so say fck it a day out i will know most there and they will know me sure what could go wrong, proceed to the church and am welcomed with open arms by most of her family, i got on really well with them anyway especially her brothers who were sound and her sisters who were good craic, sure we used to babysit their kids (many's a good night had in their houses when the kids had gone asleep ) so we proceeded to the hollybrook hotel for the festivities and after the dinner and all the usual shoite speeches in which the coonts groomsman made a passing remark in which i was mentioned and got a good laugh from his half of the room, one of the ex's brothers said to me are you going to let him get away with that, i did not know what to say never mid what to do i just wanted to leave but i was convinced to stay, anyway i was making my way back from the jacks to the bar when the ex called me in the hallway to talk to me and was trying to apologise for the w**ker putting shoite like that in the speech (i wont lie i felt the tears welling up in my eyes as i looked ah her standing there and thinking that it should be me in the room sitting at the top table in my wedding suit but i just held them back but she could see i was hurting) she took me by the hand and we walked to the reception area and had a heart to heart and i let her know how i felt but wished her all the very best in marriage but she said why did i not do this before hand i was sad that i had said this now but she would not let it go, so i had to say what was bugging me about the incident back those years ago and how that sneaky coont had wormed his way to her by fckin squealing on me and then moving in for the kill (would probably do it myself if i liked the girl enough ) the coont was now coming out to the reception area with a couple of his gobshoites to ask what was going on and what i was at so i said just having a chat with a very good friend and she backed me up to which he replied well everyone is waiting on her and she should get back in the room, she said she would be a few minutes as we were not finished talking and sent him on his way to my glee her brother had come out to make sure nothing physical was going to happen "ahem" as he said to me you should have clocked the coont, the sneaky coont certainly was not a family favourite the brother said to us to take our time. Next thing i know we are walking upstairs holding hands and i find myself standing at her door with lips locking horns, enter the room and straight onto the bed jaysus some job banging a bird in a wedding dress and her not wanting to get "anything on it" it was a great ride fairly quick but great we headed back to the reception area about 15 after the event where she proceeded to walk back intothe room and i just hung back and all i could see was her brother standing there looking at me with a big smirk on his face and then saying "i meant get the fcking groomsman back not the fckin groom but sure fck it he is a coont too " we just laughed and wandered back in, i had a huge smile on my face everytime i looked at the smug coont kissing his bride knowing where my cock had been just a short time earlier
They broke up about 5 years later she was never happy |
Bot meets girl, boy loses girl, years later boy shags girl for old time sake.....
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" BFC always gives me a laugh........ "
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ChuckVANSeagal
Kevin Kilbane
Joined: 20 Aug 2017
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Posted: 23 Sep 2017 at 1:16pm |
If you don't get invited to the whole thing, why would you even go? I hate weddings but if I get an invite, I go. I wouldn't even correspond to an evening invite. Why do they even exist?
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Sham157
Moderator Group
Joined: 17 Jul 2009
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Posted: 23 Sep 2017 at 2:00pm |
ChuckVANSeagal wrote:
If you don't get invited to the whole thing, why would you even go? I hate weddings but if I get an invite, I go. I wouldn't even correspond to an evening invite. Why do they even exist? |
because you get to avoid the boring bit but can still go and sniff out the minge
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ChuckVANSeagal
Kevin Kilbane
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Posted: 23 Sep 2017 at 4:49pm |
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