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The crap joke thread |
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daithi 
Roy Keane 
Joined: 17 Oct 2010 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 10309 |
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 Topic: The crap joke threadPosted: 06 Aug 2015 at 9:15pm |
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What does the football do when it is placed on the centre spot by the referee ?
it looks round
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Just because it's tradition does not make it right
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Borussia
Roy Keane
Joined: 14 Oct 2010 Location: UK Status: Online Points: 10774 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 9:28pm |
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Did you hear about the lad who drowned in a river of gin & tonic ?
Fell in and got schwepped away.... Edited by Borussia - 06 Aug 2015 at 9:28pm |
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lassassinblanc
Paul McGrath 
Cheese, it’s not just for eating Joined: 27 Sep 2010 Location: Clairefontaine Status: Online Points: 16487 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 9:39pm |
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What's the difference between people from Dubai and Abu Dhabi?
People from Dubai don't like the Flinstones but people from Abu Dhabi do
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Claret Murph
Paul McGrath
Hmmm, Goodness, I must say Joined: 16 Apr 2009 Location: Tibet Status: Offline Points: 15765 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 9:41pm |
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Jeeezzzz i going to bed these are bad at the best of times .
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Lansdowne Road debut aged 52 and 201 days .
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dotts101
Liam Brady
Joined: 05 Jul 2011 Location: D22 Status: Offline Points: 1674 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 9:43pm |
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A fish swims into a bar, what does he order??
CARP Lager |
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Ballycastle
Kevin Kilbane 
Joined: 30 Jan 2015 Status: Offline Points: 457 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 10:20pm |
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Have you heard about the magic tractor?
Drove down the lane and turned into a field  |
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Deane
Liam Brady
Joined: 17 Oct 2014 Location: Co Down Status: Offline Points: 2952 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 11:08pm |
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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream?
Because he was hit by a bus... |
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drog addict
Jack Charlton
Castleknocker Joined: 21 Oct 2008 Location: Sunnyvale Status: Offline Points: 6821 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 11:49pm |
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Why did the boy fall off the swing?
Because he had no arms Why did he not get back up on the swing? Because he had no legs |
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Chips don't bounce
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coyne
Paul McGrath
Joined: 17 Aug 2013 Location: Sunderland Status: Offline Points: 15881 |
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Posted: 06 Aug 2015 at 11:59pm |
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My mate David lost his ID on a night out last night, does that mean I call him Dav from now on?
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Mr.Mojo Risin'
Ray Houghton
pray for Mojo!!! Joined: 07 Oct 2010 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 3956 |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2015 at 12:00am |
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Why did no one help him?? Because he had no friends
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Ahh heya!
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Mr.Mojo Risin'
Ray Houghton
pray for Mojo!!! Joined: 07 Oct 2010 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 3956 |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2015 at 12:01am |
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What kind of bees make milk??
Boo-bees
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Ahh heya!
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drog addict
Jack Charlton
Castleknocker Joined: 21 Oct 2008 Location: Sunnyvale Status: Offline Points: 6821 |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2015 at 12:12am |
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What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk |
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Chips don't bounce
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pre Madonna
Robbie Keane
I am MALDING Joined: 30 Nov 2014 Location: Trumpton Status: Offline Points: 44659 |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2015 at 1:50am |
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2 flys fighting in a teacup, how does it start?
one flew off the handle Have you seen the film the tractor? Have only seen the trailer myself The bees are on strike...... the want less flowers and more honey How many german electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? Vun, ve are trained in such matters How many Vietnamese veterans does it take to change a lightbulb? YOU DON'T KNOW!YOU WEREN'T THERE how many French philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb? Well, firstly oui must decide if oui are truly in ze dark |
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pre Madonna
Robbie Keane
I am MALDING Joined: 30 Nov 2014 Location: Trumpton Status: Offline Points: 44659 |
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Posted: 07 Aug 2015 at 2:02am |
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How many Daily Mail readers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, cos it is all been dunne by foreners wot cant speak propah inglesh. |
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lassassinblanc
Paul McGrath
Cheese, it’s not just for eating Joined: 27 Sep 2010 Location: Clairefontaine Status: Online Points: 16487 |
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Posted: 27 Apr 2017 at 1:13pm |
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Found out I was colour blind the other day, It came right out of the purple
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Sham157
Moderator Group
Joined: 17 Jul 2009 Location: Monaghan/Dublin Status: Offline Points: 33212 |
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Posted: 27 Apr 2017 at 1:22pm |
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pre Madonna
Robbie Keane
I am MALDING Joined: 30 Nov 2014 Location: Trumpton Status: Offline Points: 44659 |
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Posted: 27 Apr 2017 at 1:25pm |
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Not sure why I either but I struggled to read it aloud for someone. You found my level! |
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FrankosHereNow
Roy Keane
I like Klopp Joined: 02 Jun 2011 Location: El Sadar Status: Offline Points: 12180 |
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Posted: 27 Apr 2017 at 2:39pm |
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What does a politician have in common and a German pornstar's mouth?
They're both full of sh*t.
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YBIG Quiz Champion 2016, 2017 & 2018.
As You Were Three in a row |
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drog addict wrote: