My Roy Keane Diary: 'A day in the life' |
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irish_major
Ray Houghton Bookie Slayer Joined: 20 Jan 2009 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 3919 |
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Brilliant
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Here we go again
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Gary McKay
Roy Keane Yo Adrian Joined: 21 Jul 2007 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 13816 |
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Brilliant stiff.
Also Gift Grub this morning. Keane checking the players Irishness by getting them to sing the theme song to Bosco
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"Smalling and Jones.... have the potential to be the PL’s best ever pairing in my opinion." - SlurAlex
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Charlton's Child
Liam Brady Joined: 30 Oct 2014 Status: Offline Points: 2824 |
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Brilliant
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Charlton's Child
Liam Brady Joined: 30 Oct 2014 Status: Offline Points: 2824 |
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Devrozex
Jack Charlton Joined: 23 Oct 2010 Location: Dublin Status: Offline Points: 7671 |
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Top notch as usual TJ.
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The Huntacha
Roy Keane Joined: 27 Mar 2012 Location: Dubai Status: Offline Points: 12701 |
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"Callum O'Dowda is showing the lads his new trainers"
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Jimmy Bullard - "Favorite band? Elastic."
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BippityBoop
Kevin Kilbane Joined: 05 Sep 2017 Status: Offline Points: 360 |
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That's hilarious! We should start a petition to get the Bosco theme tune sang at Irish games
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Bob Hoskins
Moderator Group Joined: 29 Jul 2007 Status: Offline Points: 20175 |
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Romario 2016: And the ticket mafia gets caught! Well, four years ago I had already told the government.
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pre Madonna
Robbie Keane I am MALDING Joined: 30 Nov 2014 Location: Trumpton Status: Offline Points: 44659 |
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This can be added to the 'things that make me embarrassed to be Irish' thread. How is that **** still making money off this? It's abysmal.
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FrankosHereNow
Roy Keane I like Klopp Joined: 02 Jun 2011 Location: El Sadar Status: Online Points: 12139 |
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YBIG Quiz Champion 2016, 2017 & 2018.
As You Were Three in a row |
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Trap junior
Robbie Keane YBIG Minister of Doom & Gloom Joined: 25 Jan 2010 Location: Irish Riviera Status: Offline Points: 39480 |
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Keano's Revenge September 2018 and the Nations League rolls around for the first time. Myself and O'Neill were still in the job. We had been thrashed 5-1 at home to Denmark in a vital world cup playoff game in Dublin the previous November. In the weeks after the game we had gone job hunting. O'Neill sent off a few CVs. He was in the frame for a few but then Delaney offered us new contracts. We couldn't believe our luck! It was a no brainer. We played a few mickey mouse friendlies over the summer. That English **** Arter was in the squad. I didin't like him. He was a bit soft. Too cocky and cockney for my liking. He was about as Irish as Dennis Wise! I was determined to take him down a peg or two. I don't need any invitiation when I hear he is sitting out training on 'medical advice' from the FAI physio. ''why the fcuk aren't you training!?'' I say as I storm into the physio treatment room finding Arter lying back with cucumbers on his eyes getting a massage. ''Eh what Roy?'' ''Why the f**k aren't you training?!'' ''The physio reckons I've got a grade 1 tear in my calf Roy and need to recover'' ''Blah blah f.airying blah. Get the f**k out on that training pitch you ***t so I can kick you up and down it!'' ''But Roy I'm injured. Honest.'' ''I'll give you a real injury you w**ker. You ***t. You English fcuking prick. You t**ser! You're a f**king w**ker and a ***t!! I bombard him with a torrent of abuse. You ***t! You English fcuking prick! You t**ser! You're a f**king w**ker and a ***t! You ***t! You English fcuking prick! You t**ser! You're a f**king w**ker and a ***t! You ***t! You English fcuking prick! You t**ser. You're a f**king w**ker and a ***t! Arter stands up and starts walking away. ''Come back here and take your abuse like a man!!'' ''I'm going to my room Roy.'' ''****!!'' In September Arter tells O'Neill he won't be coming back. I was f**king raging. I was looking forward to kicking him in training. Now I won't get my chance. We get another hammering away to Wales. We are still in the job. This is f**king great! We can't get sacked! We travel to Poland. A voice recording of Stephen Ward emerges online of him retelling the story of my altercation with some of the players a few months ago. I told the players on day 1 when I got the job. ''RULE NUMBER 1. YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB RULE NUMBER 2. YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB'' Ward had betrayed me in the worst way possible. He was going to f**king pay. To be continued....
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Pied Piper to: Baldrick, Brendan 88, 9Fingers, Borussia and more...
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UCDFAN
Liam Brady Joined: 10 May 2009 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 1700 |
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Which one is keane?
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www.ucdsupporters.ie
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Trap junior
Robbie Keane YBIG Minister of Doom & Gloom Joined: 25 Jan 2010 Location: Irish Riviera Status: Offline Points: 39480 |
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I don't know
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Pied Piper to: Baldrick, Brendan 88, 9Fingers, Borussia and more...
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Trap junior
Robbie Keane YBIG Minister of Doom & Gloom Joined: 25 Jan 2010 Location: Irish Riviera Status: Offline Points: 39480 |
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After returning home from Poland I had a mission. Ward was going to pay. I took a train with Martin from Manchester to Burnley on Saturday 15th September. We found out where this Judas lived, a leafy suburb a few miles outside the town. We returned by train on the Sunday and sprinkled the nerve agent Keanochok on his door handle. We caught a train swiftly home. All I had to do was sit back and wait. Burnley had a live game on Sky on Monday night. Symptoms after exposure to Keanochok show up 18 hrs after exposure. But Burnley's normally brutal left back with no touch suddenly developed the touch of the toes and was controlling the ball like never before and suddenly had super human co-ordination and was passing the ball around like Pirlo! He scores 4 goals and is MAn of the Match. Suspicions are raised. The Keanochok, instead of destroying his nervous system had altered his foot-eye co-ordination beyond all recognition for the positive. Then I realised I hadn't put enough of the stuff on his door handle and instead of killing Ward, I had inadvertently altered his nervous system and turned him into the best left back in the world. That night at 4am I got a knock on the door. Its Manchester Metropolitan Police. I'm bundled into car and rushed into an interrogation room. A few cops arrive on the scene as a light is shone into my face. ''Do you know why you're here?'' ''No'' I reply. ''We know you poisoned Ward. There's no way he has that natural ability''. ''What are you talking about?'' A man under a blanket appears in the room and is bundled down onto a chair beside me. Its Martin. We are being charged with attempted murder. ''We didn't do anything. We're innocent. We don't know anything about this incident'' ''Yes you f**king do!! Bollox!! '' Shouts the bad cop interrogator. ''We have you on CCTV in thetrain station and walking past ward's house. What the f**k were you doing in Burnley on Septermber 15 and 16?''' ''Our friends have told us how amazing Burnley is. With its population of 73,021 its famous town hall and Leeds-Liverpool canal and its famous singing Ringing Tree. We decided to take a trip on the 15th but we could only stay an hour as the weather was so hot that day. So, we returned ont he Sunday because we did not want to miss out on these beautiful Burnley landmarks.'' I say. ''You spend an awful lot of time together if you don't mind me saying'' one of the interrogator says. Martin chips in ''I know. I was afraid too that people might think we were a couple of queers. I like women. Well, only the good looking ones. I only tell my players they can bring their wives away if they are good looking. Definitely no ugly ones allowed.'' I give a sarcastic clap in my own head and roll my eyes ''well done Martin''. Gobsh*te. ''What line of business are you two in then?'' The cop asks. ''We would rather not say''. O'Neill retorts. ''Why not? People have questions. I think it looks rather guilty if you are being all evasive'' ''We're in the football coaching business'' The whole police station falls about the place laughing. For about 10 mins. After a while the laughing dies down. ''Do us a favour mate!! We've seen your teams play! You're definitely NOT in the coaching business! What's your real job!'' . And the cop shop bursts into hysterical laughter. Edited by Trap junior - 14 Sep 2018 at 11:00am |
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Pied Piper to: Baldrick, Brendan 88, 9Fingers, Borussia and more...
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Roberto Baggio
Robbie Keane UNBELIEVABLE JEFF Joined: 28 Jan 2010 Status: Offline Points: 37148 |
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Brilliant
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pre Madonna
Robbie Keane I am MALDING Joined: 30 Nov 2014 Location: Trumpton Status: Offline Points: 44659 |
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That one is actually funny!
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Claret Murph
Paul McGrath Hmmm, Goodness, I must say Joined: 16 Apr 2009 Location: Tibet Status: Offline Points: 15686 |
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Hummmm site seeing in Burnley , now beat me he should have gone to the weavers triangle or Townley Hall . Or better still should have been murdered in the town centre .
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Lansdowne Road debut aged 52 and 201 days .
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BigPodge
Paul McGrath I'm the Gaffer Joined: 18 Feb 2008 Location: 123 Fake Street Status: Offline Points: 17370 |
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Excellent work TJ
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