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Crap Joke of the Day |
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pre Madonna 
Robbie Keane 
I am MALDING Joined: 30 Nov 2014 Location: Trumpton Status: Offline Points: 44659 |
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 Posted: 10 May 2019 at 8:03pm |
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A woman is sitting at her deceased husband's funeral when a man leans into her and asks, "do you mind if I say a word?"
"No, go right ahead", the woman replies. The man stands up in the middle of the church, clears his throat and shouts "plethora" before sitting back down. The woman then stands up, turns to him and says "thanks, it means a lot".
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greenlad
Liam Brady
Joined: 30 Jan 2013 Status: Offline Points: 1694 |
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Posted: 13 May 2019 at 4:59pm |
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A nun needed to wash her clothes one day and thought as everyone was at mass she'd do it naked. She strips off when a knock comes to the door, who's that the nun shouts and a reply says its the blind man so she let's him in thinking she'd be OK, the man walks in and says oh nice tits sister and a nice pussy now where do you want the blinds hung.....
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BigPodge
Paul McGrath 
I'm the Gaffer Joined: 18 Feb 2008 Location: 123 Fake Street Status: Offline Points: 17370 |
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Posted: 13 May 2019 at 5:03pm |
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DUBLIN DOC
Jack Charlton
The F The F The FAI Joined: 30 Jun 2009 Location: Abbottstown Status: Offline Points: 9155 |
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Posted: 13 May 2019 at 6:09pm |
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I just met a Chinese drug addict, he said “have you seen my cocaine”? I said “ not since he starred in the Italian job”..
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McG
Moderator Group
SISAO? What the hell is SISAO? Joined: 27 Jan 2008 Location: Christmas Island Status: Online Points: 26979 |
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Posted: 13 May 2019 at 6:12pm |
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ffs
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YBIG Table Quiz winner 2016 & 2017
AS YOU WERE McGx |
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ACTHUNG BABY
Ronnie Whelan 
Joined: 23 Apr 2016 Location: DUBLIN Status: Offline Points: 93 |
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Posted: 13 May 2019 at 6:32pm |
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What was under the table at the Last Supper?
Judas's carryout.
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Roberto Baggio
Robbie Keane
UNBELIEVABLE JEFF Joined: 28 Jan 2010 Status: Offline Points: 37295 |
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Posted: 14 May 2019 at 7:28am |
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The wife asked me last night if I could ride her Liverpool style
I asked what do you mean Stay on top for ages and then come second she said
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drog addict
Jack Charlton
Castleknocker Joined: 21 Oct 2008 Location: Sunnyvale Status: Offline Points: 6821 |
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Posted: 14 May 2019 at 3:59pm |
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Gardai came round last night and said my dogs were chasing kids on bikes
My dogs don’t even have bikes
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Stickittotheman
Liam Brady
Joined: 15 Sep 2015 Status: Offline Points: 2289 |
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Posted: 14 May 2019 at 4:13pm |
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My sister asked me did I want to wind her new born baby? I thought that was really harsh so I just gave him a dead leg instead.
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Walters coming back from an offside position but Shane Long was definitely onside- Shane Lonnggggggg.... has done it!!!!
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drog addict
Jack Charlton
Castleknocker Joined: 21 Oct 2008 Location: Sunnyvale Status: Offline Points: 6821 |
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Posted: 19 Aug 2019 at 11:26am |
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I told my friend that I made £500 a month selling dog sh*t. He said, “That’s gross!” I said, “No, that’s net.”
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DUBLIN DOC
Jack Charlton
The F The F The FAI Joined: 30 Jun 2009 Location: Abbottstown Status: Offline Points: 9155 |
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Posted: 11 Sep 2019 at 9:40pm |
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Paid a carpenter 500 euro today upfront to build a giant size double bed for me and the quare wan,
The coont just done a bunk
Edited by DUBLIN DOC - 11 Sep 2019 at 9:41pm |
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Roberto Baggio
Robbie Keane
UNBELIEVABLE JEFF Joined: 28 Jan 2010 Status: Offline Points: 37295 |
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Posted: 11 Sep 2019 at 10:54pm |
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The weathers to be good in Dublin on Saturday
RTE are saying you’ll not need a Brolly
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Bob Hoskins
Moderator Group
Joined: 29 Jul 2007 Status: Offline Points: 20175 |
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Posted: 12 Sep 2019 at 10:35am |
 You should be banned for that
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Romario 2016: And the ticket mafia gets caught! Well, four years ago I had already told the government.
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Trap junior
Robbie Keane
YBIG Minister of Doom & Gloom Joined: 25 Jan 2010 Location: Irish Riviera Status: Online Points: 39792 |
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Posted: 04 Oct 2019 at 9:46pm |
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It's Hans free.
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Pied Piper to: Baldrick, Brendan 88, 9Fingers, Borussia and more...
97.6% chance this post will be replied to by Baldrick (source: PWC) |
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DUBLIN DOC
Jack Charlton
The F The F The FAI Joined: 30 Jun 2009 Location: Abbottstown Status: Offline Points: 9155 |
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Posted: 05 Oct 2019 at 12:33am |
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coyne
Paul McGrath
Joined: 17 Aug 2013 Location: Sunderland Status: Offline Points: 15881 |
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Posted: 05 Oct 2019 at 12:33am |
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What do you call a Mexican who’s had his car stolen?
Carlos. |
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DUBLIN DOC
Jack Charlton
The F The F The FAI Joined: 30 Jun 2009 Location: Abbottstown Status: Offline Points: 9155 |
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Posted: 05 Oct 2019 at 12:39am |
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coyne
Paul McGrath
Joined: 17 Aug 2013 Location: Sunderland Status: Offline Points: 15881 |
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Posted: 05 Oct 2019 at 12:56am |
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pre Madonna wrote: